I had a chat with Sarah, my English lecturer last week … Ad she somehow asked me to use my “skill” to write something, comment on the current issues in the news paper (besides my A level English papers also consist of commentary) and from it contribute to the society.. I have been giving in much thoughts.. until now I decide d.. to use my blog to comment on my dissatisfaction on the current situation.. So beginning from now other than my stupid routine I will write on more serious subject … no more Mr. Nice guy .

posted by Angelus @ 11:59 PM 1 comments

How do you define trust? Ermm I mean do you trust me? lol … Do I trust you? Or can I trust myself?

They are complicated, depend on how you think. Trust … comes with responsibility… You can’t simply trust people. And I mean time will reveal everything that whether you can really believe in someone or not. And truly to say 2 years is simply a short time that u can entrust people with your bank account… Seriously saying one of my friend, CY gave me her ATM card & pin n asked me to help he withdraw money.. That I questioned on her action.. She said I can be trusted. Is it? She asked me whether I’m honest or not? I really need to think for a while.. Yes. I’m very tricky at some points. But when it comes to serious matter, I think I will hold full responsibility of it. Later I asked Melvin the degree that I can be trusted out of 10.. and guess what he answered? 10.. Is it true or he tried to be nice in front of me? Frankly saying, you just cannot blindly or fully trust people in the course of 2 years. It’s just not right.

And for a guy who doesn’t like responsibility, sometimes if people trust me so much I will feel burdened. Lol.. same as old time when my ex-best friend asked me to keep his money… So it’s an honour when people entrust you. Money does matter. Because I asked my kiam siap, kiasu housemate about this, he straightly answered no without hesitation. I can’t blame him on this.. cause it really depends on one whether he or she wants to trust you or not.

How about some other matters besides money? Can I be trusted? I really can’t answer that if your definition of betrayal is I talk bad behind you (strictly for that kiasu, siu hei guy). I can keep secret. But it’s very hard in some certain situation where you need to reveal it but you have already promised others to keep it.. Such as in the war on the router I have misused some of their trust to stab the fish at the heart… It’s wrong totally wrong , as my anger has already clouded my judgment.. When I think back… wow what have I done?

So do u have any bad experience trusting people? I do… how does it feel when u trusted someone and in the end he use the trust to gain benefit by himself? WOW.. it’s seriously amazing ahhahahah!!

posted by Angelus @ 7:03 PM 5 comments

I cannot stand it anymore !!!! I couldn't zzz for 3 days straight.. and you all wanna know y? ahahah not gong to tell her. ask those ppl who's close to me.. Starts with a "H" an end s with a "B".. a 10 letters word:p

Just attended a dinner at my former german lecturer's place.. And yeah.. i can;t speak good german.. i dun wanna seak any german anymore until the end of A level... you really can;t bear to see my face trying to brew up a complete sentence of german.. except ich heisse Brian.. ich komme aus sabah.. By the way my name is not brian :p

I just can;t understand some stupid gal.. What the heck .. For no reason argued with me.. just becoz i'm the black guys friend.. yes.. "all seniors" are her enemy.. get a life plz!!! I rejected to play card game with her bf.. or maybe her bf is not actually a guy... and she started to say i;m egoistic.. YES i am.. but not at that moment.. y i can;t reject a game? and all the while i was talking to her bf.. and i dunno what went loose on her brain.. i exchange few words.. then i went to other seat.. luckily ... she packed all her stuffs home with her bf after 5 mins.. YEAH luckily.. or else i can;t bare to see her sour face throughout the night...

Other than that everything was nice.. nice... nice... And yeah S has a very nice view of the KLCC n Kl tower... woohoo... can view those buildings all the way from her apartment..and then below her house.. there was this whole strench of high class mensions... WHAT the !!!!.. OMG.. those houses r so NICE... nice as in capital NICE...So my dream in life? Get my heart-throb n live in one of those houses happily ever after ....

Talking about S's house.. it was really empty.. n i mean empty ... n lol dirty... lot of dust.. she's lazy to clean up everything.. n the good thing is Dr. L live opposite her apartment.. but didn'tgot a chance so visit him... Talking about her house.. there's a small kitchen.. and small refrigerator.. which i assume she never cleaned it.. with all those ice accumulating at her freezer.. When i say ice.. that means a lot n a lot blocks of ice.. n there's lots of gassy drink inside lol...

Then there's a dining table with 6 chairs.. a small TV.. and coffe table which she somehow chipped ourt a part b4 i reached.. then some sofas.. n that's all... lol...
And guess how much she rents it per month? RM1200...

Hmm maybe this is one of the last times that im going to see her.. since her contract will end very soon.. And talking about me being obsess with the racial issues in malaysia.. actually the foreigners know more than us ... lol Me 1 .. m'sia 0 hahhahahah.. at least i;'m not alone...

After this.. she's going to the US to do her doctorate.. in what? german?? lol.. i dunno... hahhaha

By the way.. all those sucky juniors.. damn cunning.. called for 3 cabs.. with 3 persons in each.. what the they violate the rules.. leaving me n another guy behind.. that means we have to pay more.. luckily the last cab was late.. n S drove us home.. hahah.. good for her...

And lastly I LOVE her.. hahahha ... not S my lecturer.. but HER:p ... wanna zzz d... 2.25 am.. signing off

posted by Angelus @ 11:08 AM 7 comments

Where r we now?lol Having our own path ahead of us... So my piece of advice.. just follow ur guts.. dun think so much.. Do whatever u want to do.. lol.. So hopefully i can always be there to see ur accomplishments :p

Your sailo

Angelus...

*best viewed with ur friend's comp.. coz ur laptop is hahahah

posted by Angelus @ 2:28 AM 3 comments

posted by Angelus @ 5:21 AM 9 comments

Received my new german dictionary today.. Yippie!! lol... siao dunno happy for what.. i still need to pa RM94 for it... but heck it's a good deaal since they gave me 50% discount = hard cover n cd somemore...lol

posted by Angelus @ 12:15 AM 7 comments

Have been lazing around although it's exam season, just dun have the "x factor" of being productive.. Say there's some bunch of books waiting for me at the side... There's also 2 buckets of clothes waiting for me at the other side of the toilet... What the... And yes, I do my own laudry, ialso iron my own clothes.. is it a crime? Hoohoo wait until u see me how i forgot to adjust the thermostat on my iron n melt the threads on my clothes....Ok no more for the update on my life.. serious matter bellow:

In this time and age, just mimicking my friend's essay, come on laa.. so lame.. n yeah he does come from the 80's.. What an amateurish "opening"... lol... i dun say that my english is so good.. but i think its just above average... better than most ppl.. but there r still many ppl outside who's better than me... Just a few example ==>MENJ....

Talking abut that guy... For the past few days.. all those blog hotshot like minishorts .. n otto from the nude not naked fame etc.. have been dropping bombs on that guy... And y? He's an islamic extremist... Found out from casper he was also being blocked from recom... Oh yeah that guy as a malay.. did surprised me with his usage of english.. at least it's better than mine.. lol...

So change topic.. i dun even know who the fuck is MENJ... So many things happened within these few days that made change some concepts on certain issues...

Issue like helping people...
All those lil stuffs that you think don't matter but they do ...

Wonder how a lil smile can brighten up ur day?
Wonder how some encouragement can keep you moving on?
Wonder how some smaal gift can make up ur day?

They r just some lil boost to our daily routine..

*flashback 1 week ago during my german exam...

BK n Dr.L each argued and they prepared different set of german exam papers... So every student under each lecturer needed to take their paper at different venues.. So their were some mix up n Dr L 's student some enteredour exam hall...So the black guy entered our place too coz he woke up late that day.. i was sitting in front n he entered from behind.. so i showed some gesture to him that he entered the wrong class, and i got some blast from Bk although the exam haven;t started .. What the heck... OK... i dun take it seriously n forgot it after 5 mins.. ok.. so the exam lasted for 3 hours... after that went home.. n guess what.. there was a mosquito repellent on my bed (i asked him a few days b4 for it coz i wanna borrow)... n there was a sms on my phone.. from the black guy.. apologizing cause i got scolded for him... Ok it was a surprise... I'm glad indeed.. but i view that wasn;t neccesary... Just dunno y... it was just a spontanoeus reaction to help him in the morning ... n i never expect a scolding from BK also.. even in that case.. i ever expected a gift out of it... For me it's just a small matter... And i never expected the black guy will appreciate it so much....

Ok that was a story... here's another one...
*flashback 3 weeks ago, after the war for the router...

So we were in the black guy's room.. questioning him y he sudden;y showed some violence in front of teh big fish... the loud mouth was there.. giving his long wind impractical hypocritical lecture , then he recieved his call from some guy called victor , who is also a devil himself, asking him for his car.... victor said his gf was sick n needed to borrow the car from the loud mouth...but the loud mouth rejected , (of course who wanna lend a not so close guy his car).. but he offered that he will drive them to teh hospital if he really needs it.. so blah blah the loud mouth keep explaining to us that he himself dun like victor too .. n yada yada... he help becoz this will make HE HIMSELF fell good...

Ok end of story... i wanna explain something on this.. come on laa.. only selfish ppl will say like that... We help others so that we ourselves can feel good? This is just so wrong... That means the true meaning of HELPING OTHER PPL is already being tainted... We help cause we really want to.. n it's te right thing to do... and we dun hope for redemption at the end... But i think we have the rights to ask for their help if we need to... Do we?

I really dunno how to say.. We r living in this sick materialistic world... Sometimes, when we ask for help there's no one around to help u... So how close are we to being a human? Even animals help themselves out... And sometimes i can't even sense the sincerity of helping ppl... Is it the HELPING that's important or is it the SINCERITY? Can someone tell me...

posted by Angelus @ 9:00 PM 3 comments

Dear Arlynx,

Remember i said i ran out of ideas about writing my blog? And i asked some topics from u? so here it is....

b4 that go thx ur parents 1st lol

*drumroll*

The food that i like to eat? Duh!!! So lame.. who would wanna know whta i like to eat? lol
But ok lo, since u asked for it...lol

What i like to eat, huh? I also dunno .. coz too many d....
But one thing for sure i like chinese food :p do u know that i'm suffering here for the past 2 years eating all those malay food, which i think taste worse than dog food.... and sometimes i really look down on myself by eating it... Chinese make the best char keow teow, the best ABC or ais kacang, the best ew char keuy, the best bak kut teh, the best tofu fa (who can beat chinese in those soya bean products?) the best cuisine, .... Every best food under the sun... The malays cannot mimic .The secret? chinese have fine taste for food , i guess lol... n those malay just like to eat rubbish.

I really like soya beans product ==> tofu, tofu fa, tau kua.... blah... y? just lke it lol... although tofuitself doesn't have taste..lol....n this only regard to those tofu made by chinese.. malay tofu= nono.... It's so hard like rock.. n not smooth at all... But then i dun eat japanese tofu.. quite geli ..lol i duno y....

Other than that? Mc D ...lol ... i'm addicted to it.. coz of this stupid place laa.. stupid malays cooking stupid food... And i think the coke in Mc D taste better than the original coke... lol...They put jampi inside kut lol..

And yeah one thing hate the most FISH... i dun eat fish coz i eat so muh fish when i wwas small until i'm afraid of it... Fishophobia i cal it lol:p

So u see...i dun maintain a healthy lfestyle.. so do u still wanna follow my eating routine?? lol

Yours truly
Angelus

posted by Angelus @ 8:23 PM 1 comments

Urgent!!!!!! Read this if you all think your rights are being denied!!!!
http://educationmalaysia.blogspot.com/2006/05/scholarship-quotas.html

posted by Angelus @ 3:45 AM 0 comments

Walk the line, Sing the Song, Take the Challenge

I love challenges. Life is really fun with them and it lets you test your limits. Time is short however. Get on with what you want to do in life and do it before tomorrow ends.

~II~

posted by Anonymous @ 7:55 PM 0 comments

Affirmation of the day: I am a powerful and insightful being who will not succumb to the challenges of life. Each challenge taken is like taking a small step up the highest mountain. And when you reach the top, things that seemed trivial and unclear becomes clear. Each step becomes important, each seed sown becomes a building block to bigger realities. It is the highest fulfillment in life, to finally understand the meaning and essence of life - joyful, calm, serene, thoughtful, knowledgeable and wise.

posted by Anonymous @ 7:46 PM 0 comments

I release my soul from trouble and spend each day with gratitude. And as I unburden myself with trouble, the world just melts into peace. A peace so profound that it could only be experienced by the mind. I transform all thoughts into actions, all words into being and I complete myself in this adventure called life.

posted by Anonymous @ 7:42 PM 0 comments

Words have limited vocabulary and some of the best things in the world could never be expressed by words.

So some things remain unwritten but only known in the hearts of man.

posted by Anonymous @ 7:35 PM 0 comments

Finally 1st day of A level... Not like in an exam mood also.. simply go in n do the lab... blah... nothing much.. no anxiety no fear, nothing...
by the way da vinci code is going to be release on 18 ... haha 1.5 day earlier than US if u take into account the timezone difference

posted by Angelus @ 12:36 AM 0 comments

1. a pretty gal/ a muscular hunk
2. a ugly, face full of pimples, with warts, beasty gal/guy

Which one will you approach to talk with 1st? The answer is pretty obvious.... I rest my case...

Pretty = Beautiful

Ugly=Hideous

But when u add them both :

Pretty + ugly= Pretty ugly = Hideous

Ok stop the crap.... What is the most beautiful thing is the world, have u wonder? Is the the miss universe? Is it some isolate islands in the pacific ocean? Is it the chance to view sun rise n sun set at the peak of mount everest?

Why do we have to look that far? Maybe every morning when u wake up, just look at the mirror.. and teh thing u r seeking for is just there.. YOU !! Without YOU, how is the world going to be a beautiful and coulourful place, with it's vibrant splendeor? How are ppl going to judge beautiful or ugly without you as the standard? So we should be happy for ourself. We do not need to compare with others.. Coz we r we... And there's nobody outside there's as unique as us... What we have , the others might not have it... What's the others have, we might no have it.. That's why, we need each other and not "we need to become others to be perfect".

Every scar that we have, shows that every incident that we have cross path on. Every pimple on our face show that we are gaining maturity by the moment. Every flaw that we have, shows that we are what we are - human. Every breath that we take in, shows our determination to live on. Every jealousy that we have on others, show that we want to be better than others.

So why aren't we satisfy with ourself? And yeah say no to plastic surgery lol..

I don't want another pretty face

I don't want just anyone to hold

I don't want my love to go to waste

I want you and your beautiful soul

Jesse Mccartney - Beautiful Soul

posted by Angelus @ 8:20 PM 9 comments

Finally the last chapter of the nonsense, humiliating, people whacking, files throwing, fan crashing, money losing internet politic...

How to catch yourself a big fish (Part 3)

So everything will be revealed here... Biggest conspiracy of all time, bigger than whether the black guy is a gay or not...lol!!! The white n the black guy *opps ... the black (by the way shouldn't it be the dark guy? in correct grammar?) will be distinguished...

Kindly read my previous blog if u dunno anything about what the crap i'm talking about.
*flash back 2 hours b4 D-day
THG suddenly knocked at my door and drag me n V to his room... hhahaha... something must be going on behind the shadow... hahhahaha....

*Meanwhile
The big fish & the small fry were bringing back the new ( but what the heck smae old model ) router + an amplifier.... which i dunno what the fucking reason for it....

ok, so now...THG the black guy had already discussed the stupid additional cost and now they wanna drag me in becoz i have my own agenda with the big fish which is not yet resolved... Somehow they got mentioned like wanna pull out from it and let the big fish and small fry die choking , gasping for air.. OK here it goes...

THG : u know the big dish ( it's a dish here coz the fish is going to get fried tonight) bought one extra amplier...dunno what's his motive... *me thinking : oooo motive, thought u r his freaking business partner....

Me: ya... of course....he surely going something up his sleeves... blah blah.. he's going to die.. better make sure he dun screw up anything or else i won't let him go easily....

The black guy: Yalo... y dun he buy a better one instead the smae old model which is sucky....

V: .....

Finaly they know the stupid router politic is going to kill the friendship slow n easy.....And now for the 1st time the "internet politic" is 1st introduced into our lives... hahahahaha

BLah boring conversation , until the fat loudmouth came back n we changed venue into my room...

Loudmouth : i'm very fair.. blah blah blah...u all r my friends.. both of them r my friends too... yala... i know.. u have a stinking mouth...

Coz we planned to kick the fished out of water... talk talk talk, plan plan plan until one part of the stupid conspiracy is revealed...the black guy had some stupid relationship with the big fish in the previous vote, or else i would win easily without any resistance from the fish...And the answer he gave me is "coz u were not my ally ma" what the fuck.. and yeah the loud mouth pointed out one question , since that fish so cunning , will i be cheated out of the money in the joint business * come one laaaa.... since u r so smart enough... i will laugh LIKE I NEVER LAUGH b4 seeing u got cheated in front of ur fucking eyes ....K keep taking some stupid crap n plan to kill teh fish that night...
-

-

-

D-day...

The black guy called the fish to check whether he's back d or not... ooo surprisingly he's on his room d.. so we went up ... with all my ammo loaded n ready *got blasted by them a few moment b4, coz they only know i wanna use the chance to fry me a fish*
Woohoo.. the moment i stepped in Jo's room... i had nothing to say d.. coz :

1. the router is in his room n not in the fish's room
2. nothing to argue d
3. no plan anymore

The fish was smart... lucky him... hahahah... So the black guy set up the router + the amplifier... then Jo the chicken walked in n whispered.. " hey have u all asked the fish to show the router? must ask him u know.." Fuck u laaa.. since u r his housemate y dun u go ask from him.. u think he what? saddam hussien with veto?

So the rest were outside watching some stupid low class show the fish had downloaded earlier....yada yada... n the black guy still setting up the router... then THg came in n checked out for a while... The black guy called the fish to help him... the fish never replied... The black guy called out his name again... yet no answer...For the fucking last time "&@*&(*(%^" (his name ... changed to protect his identity... and another time no sound from the fish ......

*This happened really fast.. no time to capture it....

The black guy got a hold of a pile of files underneath Jo's bed... n BANG.. Something flew out from the room.... And everyone was stunned... WOohOO... 1 point for the black guy in incredible hulk mode... woooHooO.... The fish by now should already pee-ed in his shorts...CIBAI what the fuck..... stick to the plan stick to the plan// but seriously i enjoyed this alot... blood spalting... come one.. give me blood...lol.... die fishy die.....woohooo... missiles firing from every direction... n the vitim? YAB... woohoo finally his name appeared.. coz the files belong to him....

The table fan of the small fry was broken... n the black guy rushed out to treathen the fish... Talking about anger management.. luckily to be blocked by the loudmouth... n somehow.. the small fry keep barking.. barkking like a dog... for what reason.. let u all guess:

1. His fan was broken?
2. For fun?
3. To defend the fish?

The answer is 3... what the heck.. can someone talk some sense to that fucking LOYAL DOG? My god... as outsider what do u think? someone broke ur fan accidentaly coz he was angry with somebody else... n u got all hulked up not becoz ur fan is broken but to defend the other guy? Come on laa... what does the owner feed u with all these times? JUst shut up laa.. penang guy.. u know u just look like the oenang a pek... n geeky look... just shut u when they asked u too... u know u just nearly got ur face whacked becoz of this....

After some shoutings n cursing n whatever.. the black guy wanna pull out from the internet stuff d... and there's something called money back guaranteed...the black guy called THG to calculate the amot of money he can get,.. And this is another conspiracy part dunno which idiot shout out 6 months... what the... he already used the internet for like 9 months.. n yet i only realized this the next day.. i was conned out of my money...

I have nothing to say.. coz this was out of any plan... coz who will think of violence suddenly errupted...so just shut up laaa....

Blah blah blah... we changed scene back to the black guy's room.... the loud mouth giving lecture... " u dun like somebody dun go near them laa... whatever.. cibai nonsense he's talking.. " Since u so smart why dun u go n become a councellor....

Then for no reason, the fish appeared.. what la.. seeking apology after fixing the router.. say dun have physical pain... but the heart is painful.. go to hell laa.. never seen u did this act also last time....

So the night ended the way... with both side losing... but me? i had sometime to think of some restrategising.... and caused some small waves the next day... which hurted the fish a lot... n thus putting myself on the chopping block also...

But for now... the waves have subsided... the wind has stopped.. The clouds have cleared... But does this really mean the end of it? Or something gargantuan is just around the shadow really to strike back? I dun dare to say.. it's just a sign of the coming of a huge storm perhaps....

Fuck... i sux at this.. can;t even create a good narrated story.. what the.. next time no more.. conspiracy theory... no more.. i swear... but gossips? YES everyone loves gossips

posted by Angelus @ 12:47 AM 8 comments

Okok... Since today's mother's day i will give way to a special tribute for all the mothers in the world... lol...especially mine :p.. SO there won;t be any mind blowing .. err.. sorry mind fucking... oopps... damn can;t find the correct word... blowing n fucking ?? lol.. story of the one router... lol...

So given us 24 hours per day, 8 hours for sleeping, 8 hours for working or studying, the rest? eating bathing, leasure... But have we ever wondered, how much time that we spend to remember, to show gratitute to our parents? Seriously saying, i seldom... i only think about them when i'm free... like for 1 or 2 mins that's all... And why? i can;t answer.. maybe coz i have my own life n they have theirs? but this is not a good excuse...

My mom... is the one that i turn to when i'm in trouble... when my toys were broken when i was small... when i dun have money.... when i need new stuffs... And then where will she turn to when she's in trouble? Minor --->me... but Major----> i dunno....

I have grown up under the nuture of my mom and dad of course.. * but since tody's mothers' day , of course dad should be exclude from here lol* like a lil plant, given enough nutrien, water, sunshine that lightens up our day, caring... But how about those without their mom.. i have a few friends that lost their mom under some circumstances... Do they really miss their mom? Yeah they do, BADLY... But death is inevitable...

They are consider 'lucky' already, coz at least they know what a mom's love is like.. For those who are born without a mom, then how? Seeing other ppl with their moms...having normal n happy life... what will they feel? emptiness? lonely? jealousy? i dunno ....

So arguments with our mom is just normal... Blood is thicker than water after a while.. everything will be fine as b4... And it will bring us closer than ever ...

And yet they say every mom is the same in this world... we shall see whether this is 100% true...i can say not.. it depends on the environment that we live in.. but overall they have one thing in common.. the love for their children... I shall not comment on those who left their child at the dumpster fter childbirth or whatsoever here since, today's a happy day !! lol

Their sacrifice for us are so big, their love for us is so deep...they shield us from bad weather, they protect us from problem, they guide us on our path, they witnessed our 1st walking step, they enjoyed we uttered our 1st word, they felt proud seeing us entered school, they are glad seeing all of our achievements and THE MOST IMPORTANT one is THEY WILL ALWAYS BE THERE FOR US...* even we are some rampaging psycho, armed robbers, heartless killers, cunning selfish conman - the big fish (as we seen on the news) *... There's a lot that we can do to make them happy .. * i avoid using the word "repay" as i dun think love cannot be measure in this way* So, have u called ur mom today?

posted by Angelus @ 2:08 AM 3 comments

5 days
Just a reminder. It should be a nice movie.

posted by Anonymous @ 12:25 AM 3 comments

Happy Mother's day

Two days ago it was joyous Wesak Day. I hope you've reflected on your personal growth and moved on to greater ventures. Today, it's Mother's Day and Happy Mother's day mum (if you're reading this)

It is now 2.10 am and I have exams next week. I'll leave it here for now. I love you mum..

*yawn
peace out

posted by Anonymous @ 11:56 PM 4 comments

An interesting blog nonetheless - http://kinjos.blogspot.com/2006/05/happy-buddha-purnima.html

posted by Anonymous @ 8:53 AM 4 comments

Facebook

Stares up in horror! Do I look geeky? Do I look nice in the picture? Should I put it up? What should I reply on the wall? What is my current status right now? Many thoughts are going through the teenage mind as he/she decides on what to do next on a potential celebrity break on Facebook. Facebook is a race for popularity and is a good way for making friends - some of whom you never get to know for the rest of your life and their picture just sits happily in your hall of friends. A little harrassing sometimes occur, a bit of mouthful words, a few pokes and almost always a happy ending. Welcome to the next biggest Friendster.com on the web, an internet social hangout for college kids and high school (horror.. more horror being stalked by teenage puberty boys - according to a friend). Check it out at facebook.com.

posted by Anonymous @ 8:39 AM 3 comments

Chiropractic Rocks!

Have you experienced back pain before, or just a plain old simple headache? Have you tried all remedies and are exhausted by all means? Have you tried banging your head on the wall to stop your mind for shouting at you at night? Have you been delusional, dreamy and unfocused? Have you been troubled, depressed and having a loss of appetite? These are not normal symptoms if you have perfectly aligned bones and nerves.

Nerve impulses travel through the body via channels such as the hollow holes through the back bone and between muscles. Like a half open wire, the nerve wire travels up to the brain. Occasionally, when the bones are misaligned due to muscle tightness or unbalanced movement, the bones are pulled aside and so are the nerves. When the nerves are tight in certain parts of the body, resistence to body current flow/impulses increases and some information is not passed on to the brain. It may retain there until sometime later; an example, impulses that trigger emotional response from the surrounding may stay until much later and this delayed effect could prolong the misery of feeling the same emotional sickness all over again. Chiropractic helps relieve depression.

As far as headache goes, it too is relieved because the nerves at the neck are brought back into alignment and are no more pinched. Blood circulation returns to normal too because the blood arties that flow trough the neck bones might get pinched as well. Chiropractic is a wonder medicine for people seeking a healthy lifestyle. It complements all energy art, yoga, tai chi and reiki, leading to a more sensitive body and a more calm and composed self. Try out chiropractic and experience it for yourself. Your eyes may see better for the first time and you may experience everything to the fullest extent because all the impulses triggered gets to your brain at once. It is a rush - that is better than any stimulant or drug.

Chiropractic fees are still a bit expensive and we should try to bring down the price. Weekly adjustments are good to maintain body health and posture. Imagine a pain free dynamic body. That is freedom and happiness.

posted by Anonymous @ 7:43 AM 8 comments

How to catch yourself a big fish (Part 2)

This will be just a transistion point to the revealing of the world biggest conspiracy of all!!
After a few weeks on the going, the black guy as the admin.... The router succumbed to a natural death...
Here's the stupid stuff.. no one living below wanted to go upstairs and have a look at the router... coz me and the black guy had succesfuly "revived" the router for a while in the afternoon.. but the problem persisted in the evening...
So lastly no one can satnd the life without internet d.. n we all decided to go up together to the big fish's room to have a look at the router....
and tada!!!! the router was confirmed dead.... So i will now introduce the loud mouth into the story as he will appear inside for the 1st time lol.... OK there were me n the black guy. so i asked him where's the receipt.. as we could go and change for a new one... since he's the one who bought the router ... But it's no where to be foound.. so he decided to *i dunno seriously or jst playfully* to make the fish as the scape goat... since the rouetr's box is in his room.. n he's the one who installed the router.. then blah blah... got ppl blame whoever who spoilt the router... Got 2 theories here actually:

• The router is dead becoz it's out outside the room, and exposed to the weather
• The arial of teh router is broken by teh fish...

So there's a small debate... but then the black guy has no stands at all (thx to his not so good vocabulary against the loud mouth n the big fish).. and me.. i have nothing to fight for... and the loud mouth was there.. he surely will not sparingly let go of me if i shoot some words at the fish.. since both of them got some business relationship....

So yadda yadda... no one wanna take the blame... and so. everyone pay again for another new router.. since the small fry n the big fish was planning to go kl the next day.. n yeah.. what a smart ass... i allow both of them to go together...

*This is the lamest part as no one was injured... no shouting... no cursing...*but tune in to tomorrow.. the final part of the trilogy.. where every conspiracy regarding the "internet politic" is exposed...

posted by Angelus @ 2:33 AM 6 comments

How to catch yourself a big fish (Part 1)

*Flash back a month ago*

"that guy , i'm not satisfy with him" "see, he has been abusing the admin power" "V has to go up to his room and asked the big fish to unblock the torrent"

These were the stupid complains that i filed to the holy guy (THG)... THG also noticed the "abnormal" download of his bit comet, but then he asked me to be patient and wait a while to make sure i could prove the big fish was behind all those anomalies in downloading... As the fish misuse the admin power and sometimes block us all from online , (which everyone of us share the same amount of money for the freaking internet connection) coz he always thinks that everything belongs to him...And out of disatisfication i have modified the router twice while he's not around without any obligation ... coz both his housemates, Y.A.B. and Jo gave me the 'mandate' of doing so... but the big fish always come back with something and change back everything to suit him.... So for 2 weeks i gather everything n formed alliance with those ppl who r not satisfy with the big fish, call it underground movement....Trying to fish the big fish out of the water.... just call it an agends between me n him...

So "War of the router" started .... on Tuesday...as i was waiting for THG to return from his genting trip with his gf.. So what the heck.. have to suffer a bit during the weekends... In the morning, i discussed a while with V for what i should do.. He suggested that i should use diplomacy while negiotiating with the fish... Coz i always make hasty action.. and i really wanted to give a full blast to the big fish....

Later in the evening, i met up with THG n the black guy(who i didn;t speak to for like 4 months) and asked a meeting to be done to solve the PROBLEM... The black guy is another so called "super power" in the house, as the big fish is afraid of him, and somemore.. the big fish does think that the black guy will have some use for him... while we were discussing like making admin for all , the small fry for no reason appeared... and we asked his opinion.. and without hesitation he answered NO... but in the end getting some blasts out of us 3... Coz there's no reason for him to refuse as he doesn;t even own any comp...then we decided the fucking meeting which we saw some blood splat to be conducted at 10pm....

*wait*wait*wait*
10pm.. ok i was eager to go n kill the fish now.. but too bad.. the black guy, small fry , THG n the big fish were still in the middle of another meeting for some fucking treasure hunt , which later they lost like shit lol!!.... then it was postponed to 10.30pm.... Luckily the loud mouth wasn;t around .. or else it will be a heck of fucking clouded water... He and his fucking theory that won;t ever be practical in real life...

So the black guy give some "opening speech" blah blah blah stating the problem we were facing.. and passed it to me.. what the heck.. But i was really happy to see the surprised fish face... he never saw all of this coming , crashing on his head... So.. i said i want admin for all... but the 1st word that came out from his stinking mouth is "No!'... then i accused him of misusing the admin power .. blah blah blah....Then miraclelously out of no where the small fry voiced out some rubbish while doing his homework.. (note: i have discussed this with V b4, coz i dun see the big fish as a threat.. it's just the dog that he owns with the poisonous bites)..i dun care whatever he said i just blasted back with rubbish also.. tension arises.. as there are 2 packs... one was me... and some other mute listeners.. then there were them the big fish n the small fry... then the black guy have to bug in and asked for voting... and somehow i got 6 votes for admin for all n they all just 2.. so it's obviously that they dun have any support.. but yada yada what can u do with 2 born sore losers...

Blah blah blast here n there again... then the balck guy came out with 2 admins to control each other... that's me n the big fish... n heck as you all predicted... that fish blah blah again.. say laa.. that's not a good idea.. or whatsoever... i dunnno why it's not a good idea.. is it becoz he won;t be in CONTROL anymore? then whatever weekdays n weekends system which i think it's plain stupid... And then the motion of 2 admins was put into voting again.. the result still the same.. 6 Vs 2... there's really no reason for them to argue anymore.. so they raised the incident of i modified the router 2 weeks ago to fight back.. but to no avail... he started to question why i didn;t tell him... or at least called him to inform.. but heck who's he.. he doesn;t own the router. n i said i have informed THG b4, and i think it's enough... THG finally voiced his opinion , " i dun think it's neccessary to inform u" .. woo hoo... u shuld see the face of the big fish ... lol.. then " i dun like you . u think u can simply come into people's home and simply modify the router?" See, that guy really thinks he owned the damn fucking house n the people inside also.. this is ur deifination of a Control freak.. lol

Then later got few bites from the "i have no mindset" dog... what the...Then the fish threatened to pay me back my money n ask me to leave.. luckily with "I'm so smarter than u" brain of mine, i countered back with ' why dun i pay u back n kick u out... who the heck u think u are..we all share the same amount of money... " he become slient immediately....

Blah blah at the heights of the argument... the black guy walked up with a great idea.. he himself becomes the admin... I fuly supported it as long as the big fish is not in control... hahah the fish face was red with rage.. n what could he do? the tide is not at his side.. but to accepted obediently lol... and so the 1st battle was won by me.. 1 against 0 yippie !!!!

As i returned back to my room... i told V... i was actually so damn frightened a while ago... it was like .... just something that i can't describe it.. if i lose i lose it all.. but luckily with the support from others, i made it back alive with PRIDE.... lol.. And with V retelling the story in a "i'm a hero" way lol ....he said he was worried for a while i might give in to the fish... lol... i had my doubts too...ppl beside might think that i'm fearless but i'm not... lol... n fact it's just the urge of defending what's right that made me look not so afraid... coz if u noticed that i was shaking my leg vigorously, meaning i'm nervous.. lol... It's just an act.. dun ever show that u r inferior than ur opponent... dun show ur fear.. this was what the big fish wrongly did... he wasn;t prepared for it...

so the stituation became beter for a while... until another dark incident happened with the router..... Stay tuned for the part 2 of the how to catch urself a big fish...The road to the final battle.. lol

posted by Angelus @ 2:05 AM 13 comments

Jeff humors us with his writing like a jokester but his stories are soulful and moving. I like this story of yours which will go on for 4 days. I'll be waiting for the installments. Meanwhile I shall write a guide about Malaysia for visitors.

To date, Malaysia is one of my best shopping experience in the world. Shops are clustered and nicely organized in shopping complexes and everything is in one directory that is found on all floors. The size of shopping malls in Malaysia can be somewhat overwhelming for first time visitors and you may have an overtendency to be wowed by it. All the shopping malls are indoors and you'll have a nice cool shopping experience in a temperately warm country in Malaysia.

In Mid Valley, which is accessible by train now and taxis, but train is still recommended unless you stay nearby, is one of the biggest and extravagent shopping mall in Malaysia. From far it looks like a huge canopy which spans a large area. There are four main entrances one in each cardinal direction of the compass. There are 430 shops in the buiding alone, a huge gym, a high tech cinema and large eating areas and food court. My favourite stores,MPH bookstore and The Feng Shui Megamall are there too. MPH has a lovely fountain in the store that people can sit around while reading. Classical music plays in the air and it's a lovely place to read and unwind.

Outside the shopping mall there are a plethora of food shops one of which is the Chinese Hong Kong chain shop, Kim Gary. Here they serve delicious milk tea and cheese rice with meat fillings. This is heaven. Food is a main concern in Malaysia and people all over the place are looking for new and nice places to eat at.

Things in Malaysia are also 1/4 cheaper than the goods sold in the States. It is most favorable to shop in. Shop in malls as they're the safest way to shop for genuine products (please make certain of this too). Other shopping malls that are huge, great and superb (although not for the feet) are Wan Utama Shopping Mall (lovely place with medieval theme) and Times Square at Bukit Bintang. Not to be missed are the old malls on Bintang Walk which are Lot 10 and Sungei Wang (Money with river when translated from BM). Learn some local phrases so you can interact with the people, although they do speak English.

For cheap hotels in main town area call for local agencies to get a cheaper rate. Hotels here are relatively much much cheaper than hotels in the States. If you enjoy nature, try going to Borneo Island where Sarawak and Sabah is, my home sweet place. Although Sarawak and Sabah are two different states, they're on an exotic island. It a kewl place to be if you like water sports, parachuting, jungle hiking, rafting, swimming or nature walks. There's so much to entice you, the local food - Sarawak Laksa which is the yummiest in the world - it's like Mee Hoon or small mee. There are so many local customs from Chinese New Year to Deepavali. Kuching or Sarawak is a beautiful place to be at.

posted by Anonymous @ 10:32 PM 3 comments

How to catch yourself a big fish

Guess what has been keeping me awake at 2am? Just can't get the "excitement" i have witnessed tonight out of my head... This is going to be title of what has happened in my hostel for the past few weeks until today..The story is going to run for 4 days starting from today's prologue and characters introduction lol!!

1. The big fish.. - of course you can't miss out the main character
2. The follower/small fry of the big fish a.k.a. the dog if u viewed at another perspective
3. The loud mouth...
4. The black guy
5. The holy guy
6. Y.A.B. (yang amat blur) - although he won't appear much in my story , just wanna add him in for fun.
7. Jo- another chicken who lives in oppression and need saving lol
8. V - Just count him in for the fun ride...coz he is really good in narrating stories
9. And urs truly, me

Tagline: Whoever controls the router, controls the world!!!

Problem: To topple the corrupted big fish who is controling the router...

Prologue :

9 people forked out money and shared one fucking jaring wireless broadband connection ... Problems arises as some ppl can't get good connection and blah blah blah.. all the while the damn fucking router is located in the big fish's room.. So he has a sense of control over everyone who shared equally in the router and the wifi service... And somehow the corrupted fish just can't give vent to his frustration and felt lost when the router was removed from his room to a more strategic place... and since this there r some hormone disorder in the fish , he used his admin power to just simply blocked other users for his own benefit (downloading illegal series n movies form the net)....This is what i call craving for power....Then that's a plot to dethrone the big fish

*Note : the story is strictly from my side of view .. and there will be prejudice and biased and conspiracy lurking around... lol

posted by Angelus @ 10:59 AM 6 comments

IF you happened to read The Star (11th May 2006 *today* page 4) you will notice that there's an article titled "Names of PSD scholarship WINNERS out today"... So that means those students that didn;t obtain the scholasrships are called LOSERS? .... And are those Winners will truly be winniers in lives? I'm very disappointed with the title of the article.. Is it a good way to promote a society in this way? mening get the scholarship are u will be at the top of the world... Failto obtained it.. you just find a place to hide your face.. and i dun view as something horrible also if u didn;t get it... So ppl outside stop whinning there... You stil have some journeys ahead... And plz... i dun want to see some disappointed face around..

I;m guaranteed that tomorrow there will an outroar in the newspaper... It's just a trend in our sick society... Today, the names of the WINNERS and tomorrow some sore LOSERS complaining/appealing... sigh.. what the f***

posted by Angelus @ 3:13 AM 2 comments

Intimidation

Intimidating is an act to gain control over a situation. This is a primal response, for lions to intimidate hyenas to protect their young and chickens too. We have inherited the art of intimidation and it is not pleasant. You may have felt it in a point in life. If you are reading this, judge youself now, have you been too commanding or over sheering? Do not do onto others what you do not want others to do onto you. Be humble and nice and you will make more friends and be a much happier individual. Belittling is intimidating and is harmful to the same degree to youself and others. Intimidation happens when you fear, so when you are intimidating someone next time, be aware of the effect it has on you. Instead of intimidating someone face your own fears. Be honest to youself and so as to why you say some things about some people and make a post on a blog/diary. Are you trying to intimidate someone or are you conveying your own truth. Truth feels so much better.

posted by Anonymous @ 10:51 AM 7 comments

The many facets of friendship

The subject of friends is always a complicated and difficult debate. We are friends with another person because we do not want to be alone and we want someone to talk to. This is the law of attraction, like attracts like and you have two lonely people who become friends and are never lonely again. However the rule of the world is that everyone moves on once a need is satisfied. There are many hierarchies of need according to Maslow's hierarchy of needs and is detailed in psychology. The first of all human need is psychological which is what your body needs to sustain itself. The susequent ones are safety, love/belonging, esteem and actualization. Friends fulfill most of the needs that we have including safety, love/belonging and self esteem. Having friends make you feel good because you know you are not alone in your passage of growth and you belong to a group of friends. This is also the cause of popularity contests between groups of cliques which arises to giving self esteem. Would you feel good if you are among an elite group of people? Of course. You feel powerful and protected. And when you are famous many friends will ensue.

What is a definition of a friend? Someone who entertains you when you are bored? Someone who listens and look up to you? Someone who likes you? From these general questions above, it is easy to classify friends into a few groups that fulfills your psychological need. The first group who are friends who make you feel belonged to a group and loved will entertain you and look after you. This kind of friendship could be a casual one or a close one. Either one is possible but usually it would start off as a casual one. The second class of friendship are friends who make you feel good and that fulfills the first priority in the psychological needs. Judging from our psychological needs, this second class of friends will be considered your "best" friends although for some people, it may not be the case. The more knowing individuals would say that these group of friends are ego boosters and are usually unreal. Why would they go to great lengths to make you feel good. Remember the tv advertisements? Why would they want to make you feel good using their product? Because they want something in return. Everything in this world is based on a give and take mechanism. The second class of friends belong to leaders who usually have a large and heavy responsibility. To enlightened people like the Buddha, these group of friends can illude reality and cause material attachment. These people fear when they could not do something well and may cause their friends to abandon them. Everything has to be perfect to these individuals and this can wreck their lives. Honesty is sometimes not found in friendship and it may take more than a friend to be honest to yourself. The buddha also once said that true spiritual leaders are peerless in the sense that they are not attached to their friends and treat them as people who are undertaking the same spiritual paths. A practice usually done when reciting the buddha's teaching is to make an affirmation to not meet any foolish individuals some of which you may call friends who could cloud your judgement. We ask for good friends who will help us along the way and keeping in mind that our paths are our own to walk and at a point we have to leave our friends behind to search for our spiritual/material path and truth.

posted by Anonymous @ 10:12 AM 4 comments

Sometimes i question myself , do i need friends? Yes i do. For someone who's afraid of being left alone and gets bored easily i need friends ...lots of lots of friends... B4 this i also did some phychological test that indicated how important friendship is in my life. But becoz i'm some stubborn asshole i tend to lose some friends too in the process.. I can just simply ignore or boycott my friend by just giving in to hatred...lol Like how i lost my best friend in secondary school becoz of a tiny lil problem. becoz both of us a damn stubborn and won't give way to each other, then crisis arised... Thinking back on it it's just plain stupid...We have gone through a lot, troubles, joys, storms, hurricanes, whatever u name it... We both were excellent students in the best school back in my hometown , got good grades for our exams, argued, acted like stranger in the top college that we coincidentally entered, had our own seperate life, then drifted away ....

Ok cut the crap, friends are ppl who will stand by ur side at any circumstance, cherish you, cheer you up when you are down, weather the storm for u and most importantly let you copy their homeworks *as i'm a lazy ass who never do my homework*..... Due to this we tend to get attach to them become less independant as i'm now... but heck, you have friends , what are u afraid of lol....

So do you have any best friend? I currently don't after losing that friend back in secondary school.. Somehow it's very hard to find someone who knows you so deeply, understand ur feelings... etc.... And i do categorized my friends... good friends... n "dun get so close " friends... FAVOURISM as i mentioned in my previous post...

And i also sperate my friends into 3 groups:
1. back in my hometown
2. in college
3. online

The 3 groups of friends dunno each other as i never mentioned any of the 2 other groups to a particular group... So i have my own circle of friends back home, back in college, n online =D I also dunno why.. as yesterday night one of my online friends, R raised this question, that i never mentioned about my friends to her b4... lol and i told her that this is out of her concern... they will never meet also lol...

What make friends special , is that they will accept who you are... although giving some comment once in a while will not make any harm lol... But then who will expect you to change immediately after giving comments.. afterall human can't change their nature so easily lol
" i'm what i am, and if you can;t accept that , just get lost, or at least give me some time to review and think about it " lol ... That's the fun thing of having friends... But " friend" who can just change some characteristics after u have commented a bit on him/her is just too fake for me... It's just not "right" , as "one" dun need to actually give in becoz other ppl dislike it and in return the "one" will REMEMBER the incident for life...And do u consider making fun about ur friends becoz he/she took Windows XP for beginners and read it in the toilet as BETRAYAL? i dun... It's a bless that everyone can crack joke about each other and can get a good laugh out of it... It's just SHARING!!

My good friends are friends that i can talk freely to.. whatever.. i know they will listen to me.. but whether they give a damn to it or not, that i dun care..lol....and my "dun get so close " friends are just ppl that i know vaguely , hard to communicate n really get into my nerves most of the time... either they r just some loud mouth or whatever... And talking about my hometown friends.. i really seldom see them nowadays... and somehow i think since everyone has their own life, a great barrier has formed between me n them... Just not to say that , i'm a jerk back in secondary school also.. but friends r still friends lol... and my college friends? Most of them i meet almost 24/7.. coz we r living together... and therefore.. conflicts can rise easily... but give a lil bit of tolerence and everything will go smoothly...How about my online friends? Some are my friends that are living overseas... And due to the fact that we dun need to face each other i just talk whatever crap i want, i never give much thoughts into it whether it will hurt ppl or not... *then need to make phone calls to apologize * lol...*whoever laughed after reading this, it's you * lol.. And i have to give some credit to R, thx for being my good online friend.. Life will be very boring u know...

*sigh* i'm destined to annoyed ppl more than earning their respect.. so i expect no one will come to my funeral if i died .. lol... Life is life... friends are just part of our lives.. We meet new ppl and we consider them as our friends too.. but really true friends are hard to find... Other then the secondary school friends that i lost.. i too lost alot of "good good' friends... lol.. which i sometimes regret.. But then what to do.. i'm very egoistic... and u won;t see me apologizing easily... It takes a lot of courage to do so... And i dun have it... Just a piece of advice value ur friends.. lol.. And talking about it... How many TRUE friends do u all have?

posted by Angelus @ 1:02 AM 8 comments

Give you 2 choices:
To be on the winning team or to be at the losing side. Which side will you choose... This is a crystal clear answer as everyone loves winning... I dunno why, we will do whatever it takes just to WIN... *sigh* Most of the time it does matter whether we win or not.. There's why there's such a thing called "COMPETITION". And futhermore it's a winner takes all world and no such thing as 2nd place... To get a 2nd place that means u will be forgotten in no time. For ur information I too like to win... and really i do get carried away 70% of the time when i win...and that means i dun give a damn for the so called "loser(s)"...

But sometimes do it really matter to win? Yes it does sometimes, as it's a measurement to see ur achievement.. but sometimes no... becoz besides from gaining at the same time u might lose something more precious also...Everything is just a mere euphoric state.. .

It's a matter on how we win and not why we want to win... it's either we win becoz we are a loud mouth (n talk n talk n talk ur opponent to dead.. or just some "u think u r smart" talks... that u never give other ppl chance to refute?) and nobody else dare to challege us or we win becoz we r capable of winning it. And through the process whether our opponent acknowledge our success or not.. Talking on this , it's a very subjective issue.. as i mentioned b4, most of us will try our best to win...and we won;t care much about the other ppl next to us...

I read about a survey carried out b4 :
1.Given a group of ppl answering some quiz.. and they will receive money for each correct answer...
2. Given another group of people answering some quiz.. and they starts with $500... and for every wrong answer, their stach of money will be deducted..
The result shown that the people in the 1st group show much anxiety and keen in WINNING... Otherwise for group 2 ppl ,where for every wrong answer they stand the risk of LOSING their money... Talking about tough luck ... hahahhahaha

In the end what we gain from winning? Fame, popularity, money, gals and whatsoever.. What we gain from losing? Nothing...Sad feeling, disappoinment... Can't utter a word as if it will take ur life away?(or experience this is what the cliche used by the "loser(s)" to console themselves)... But i thought the winning team also gain experience from it... So we can only see benifit in winning... That's called life.. survivor of the fittest... I win becoz i'm better than u and nothing else...

So it's up to you all whether you all wanna be at the winning team or at the losing side... But it won;t bring any meaning after a while.. coz everyone is going to die hahhahahahah... afterall people will get tired of winning also once in a while... dun mentioned about losing...

posted by Angelus @ 12:14 AM 5 comments

Letting go

When the whole world comes to a stop,
I look around the frozen frame,
I take my hand and reach for an arm,
But it's frozen still in time and place,
I wonder around admiring places,
And see my face reflected on the stream,
I gaze up high at the sun that shines,
It's rays captured in still frame,
The still wind feels like cotton pushing against your body,
The grass feels stiff like icycles,
The birds above frozen in flight,
And cars caught in rainbow dashes of color,
Kids at the playground frozen in track,
Naughty faces and cute smiles,
Mothers gaze in stillness into innocent space.

The moment I snapped my fingers aloud,
The cars start honking, children start giggling and mothers continue chattering,
Such life, such wonder, such blessing is the world,
The world that we live in.
I let go of the memory of that moment in time,
Although it was quiet, peaceful and serene,
But such deafness is not the world,
And I would rather live in the present time and place.

posted by Anonymous @ 10:34 PM 1 comments

A tribute to Lord Buddha

There are many buddhas contrary to common belief. According to modern interpretation Buddhas are equivalent to god. (which some people tried to argue with me about especially other religious groups when I claim that the Buddha is revered for his teachings and philosophy and not his godliness. But since you put it that way, oh well, in many terms Buddha can be considered god, depending on what you mean by god) God in the highest realm of existence, some believe non-existence, which I agree to an extent. There have been debates and according to the texts, Buddhas go through a cycle where each ruling buddha will appear at a certain time and another buddha will take over once his dominion span has ended. When that happens, I believe Buddhas go into extinction and they only remain as a being admired by men for countless eons to come (if the stories of the Buddhas survive the long time span) such as the primordial buddha, Samantabhadra Buddha. There have been prophecies by Shakyamuni Buddha, the current ruling buddha that there will be priods where the dharma he taught will be remembered and then lost and rediscovered by other future buddhas. All buddhas speak the same truth, and that is the ultimate law of the universe. One of which is rebirth. Although certain religion do not acknowledge rebirth as a part of life, more and more people are coming to see and remember that rebirth is a process which is caused by attachment to worldy possession such as fame, fortune, family, etc..etc.. Edgar Cayce, the famous Christian psychic spoke of reincarnation, so do many New Age believers of various faiths who regard reincarnation as a part of the cycle of life. Each being will be reincarnated unless they release themselves from the bonds of attachment. Even deities and high spirits and elementals are reincarnated once their lifespan is up. It is like different parallel realities which like the human world comprises of birth and death. The sutras once spoke of ancient civilizations that would live for eons and centuries due to their good karma. This may not refer to the earthly plane and could refer to the higher planes of existence instead such as heaven. This depicts the story of Adam and Eve who were cast down to Earth to lead a human existence which is shorter due to their sins. That is why Buddhists always make aspirations for themselves and others to be born in the higher planes and if possible liberate themselves from all forms of existence, to be a bodhisattva or buddha. There are various families of buddha each representing the most refined characteristic of all existence such as wisdom, perfection, life, kindness and healing. There are five main families of buddha each with their own distinct name and characteristic. All buddhas are one and one is all. They take many forms and the category that we split them into just explains each of the vast virtous quality that they have that we can emulate. Of my favourite buddhas are Manjusri, the wisdom buddha, Amitaba, the Buddha of paradise, Medicine Buddha and, Vairochana, the teacher Buddha and Amoghasidi Buddha, the Northern transcendental Buddha of Karma. Of the buddhas above starting from amitaba, they're dyani buddhas. Manjushri is the prince of bodhisattvas in the dhyani cluster and is the intrinsic quality of all the buddhas. He is the emanation of all the Buddha's wisdom. Buddhas are given names and figures to remind us of the virtuous quality each represents so we can identify with the certain quality in a more focused way. We all eventually embody all virtues of the buddha and it only needs to be cultivated.

posted by Anonymous @ 7:33 PM 0 comments

Release yourself from troubles

What do you do when you face troubles? Do you fret and worry? Don't do that, seek inner guidance and release the rest of the matter that couldn't be resolved to light. The buddha once spoke of effortless living as the real way of life. This may sound contradictory to one of the values in the eight fold path which is the right effort, but effortless living here does not mean that you don't have to do anything. You just have to do what is in your mind. Listen to your own inner guidance, follow it positively, create a positive mindframe, pray for positive results and take your action. All things done should be forgotten once the lessons are learnt. Hold not to the past and release yourself from trouble and the cycle of life. There shouldn't be any burden. You are a creature of light, a creation of evolution or god. You can live your life free of fear and that is the real intention of life, a life of meaning and wholeness.

posted by Anonymous @ 7:23 PM 0 comments

I'm not those people who can accept critics easily.. But it also depends on who gave me the comment.. And certainly i won;t accept it from some other loud mouths, empty barrels who can't accept it at all... What's the point of arguing with this kind of people.. They keep talking n talking .. Maybe they feel insecure n inferior.. that's y they need someone to show off to....So what i like to post nonsense on the net.. And becoz u think u r smart enough and say it's not good to do so... so shut up ur mouth coz if i tell u like that, u won;t act accordingly also...

posted by Angelus @ 5:39 PM 0 comments

The world would be a wonderful place if we just view it in a positive way.. But who cares? i just like to view it in a pessimistic perspective . It is just the way things go.. people like to dig out all those ugly sides of everything. From my point of view, there are only 2 choices... ULTRA GOOD or ULTRA BAD.. there's no grey side in between. either one have to be very very nice to get noticed or vice versa... I'm speaking this out of experience..
And yeah it's the nature of mankind to be judgemental too.. This is becoz there r comparisons for us to judge on.. There will be something called "good" when there's something called "bad" Somehow they just balance out.
In my opinion we are going nowhere from here. As we turned our backs behind there will be someone who's talking about us. Judging whether we are "good" or we are "bad". I'm too one of those people.. Maybe we find joy or self content in talking about others while promote ourselves at the same time. I'm not trying be a hypocrite here but i think it's very unfair for those who got "stab" at the back lol... But this is reality.
Now how good is good enough? What our society looks highly upon is people with good result.. and this is starting to create a pressure cooker for the younger generation. 2 years ago.. i went for an interview for the stupid PSD scholarship , and i was never keen into getting it ... never to say even thought of appealing if i failed to get it... and yet i was offered a pplace too.. But then now to show to the others you are really DAMN GOOD.. it's a must to become a PSD scholar... This scence is very popular among the chinese... But i can't see it very clear among the malay (which i view as the weaker race).. eventhough in this field i salute the malays for not be so "kiasu".. The "kiasuness" among the chinese is very intolerable... If i had the chance i would like to use my shoe to wack almost all... 85% of the chinese scholars...This is a very crucial issue.. and shouldn't be turned a blind eye onto.
Becoz... GOOD in academics doesn;t mean that u will GOOD in everything.. And clearly to say the chinese viewed it at the wrong wat all this while.. And who's the blame? the government.... for not creating fair and competitive environment for all.. Yes, i'm GOOD in my education also.. but at least i know where's my standard... and i know how to cook, CLEAN the room, have FUN... unlike someone who i view as kiasu n selfish...Furthermore i can categorize the technique of asking question into GOOD and BAD also.. the good: ask becoz u really dunno and it's really important for u to know the answer.. the bad: Ask becoz u r afraid u know less than other ppl and "u smile like u never smiled b4" * this is refering to some other guy i know..
Am i good or am i bad? i would answer that i'm not good entirely, and i'm bad most of the time. I do like to help ppl... but i sometimes choose not to help those who i dislike and this is the bad part of me. FAVOURISM or DISCRIMINATION is the word for it.. Don't tell me this is BAD i know it.. coz the government is a good example for this. I'm good in activities that don not need much motion but i'm bad in sport... But i'm satisfy with it as i do not need to force myself so that i could become BETTER than other people... I know what i need to know not becoz i'm afraid of knowing less than other people...
heck ... this is a competitive world... no one is going to have mercy you if u sit on the floor crying like a baby saying that you r the victim of some whatever reason... This is the world where you promote urself... offering urself and state the reason that you are BETTER than others so that people will choose you. But really "kiasuness" isn;t the path to go..
This is the story of the GOOD and the BAD.... which the 2 words are just relative to each other .... and yet they do bring a lot of impact to our lifestyle....

posted by Angelus @ 12:49 AM 5 comments

The 3rd version of windows messenger live 8.0 is already out. It's said to be the final beta b4 the end product. And somehow it's a lot different than the 2nd version :D Ended my class today at 12 pm.. Luckily BK didn't nag so much in the german class today. Guessed she has got everything sorted out and can't do anything more with us , since only 6 out of 16 people turned out today. Later we have the last class of chemistry where our pretty and soft and everything nice Miss Lim gave us some guidance in chemistry lab..And now i'm starring at my screen pondering what to type after i couldn't online for the past 2 hours, when i resorted to sleep. The workers outside my hostel are doing some renovation and i think when the new batch of jpa scholars arrive all those construction job will be done.. And heck who cares.. Got a feeling that they will be too damn nerdy to notice those changes too (some of them gave me a bad impression in recom). Yea... i forgot that my A level exam is starting next week.. talking about all the "nothingness" that i have done during the past few weeks.. i can just lie on my bed and read comics or just do nothing.. sigh call that a time management:p jetzt denke ich, ob ich morgen den deutschen unterricht blau machen werde. *I'm thinking now whether to skip the german class tomorrow. Finally life would be simpler, if i just use this motto:
I owe it the taxpayers and not to the government !"... lol

posted by Angelus @ 11:45 PM 0 comments

Just visited a site, can't stop laughing reading it. The creator is a guy who doesn't own a credit card and never done a transaction in ebay b4...And yet... he wrote articles on how to be succesful in ebay.. hahahha ...
Just came back from SACC and got myself a nice haircut... quite cheap also... I'm so into Rascall Flatts nowadays... the songs r really nice.. Woohoo Ronan's newest album is coming out real soon. Can't wait for it.. the new single "All over again" is already available

posted by Angelus @ 8:28 AM 0 comments

We are our past, present and future. Nothing can be taken forgranted and each lesson in each period of our life is crucial in making sense of our life.

posted by Anonymous @ 8:01 AM 0 comments

Education tells a lot doesn't it. I do agree that Singapore is led by many brilliant leaders who are also excellent scholars in many fields. I also think that the selection of leaders in Singapore is more open and based on merits. I wonder when would Malaysia start with an open policy and disclose the education background and past history of a politician. Right now, we do not know a lot about our own politicians than we already have, of course, only knowing the fact that they're nice people. Talk about blind vote. We vote based on brand name. Majority as always would always vote for the current government, others who are opposition would vote for the other parties. The clash of interest is not so much about the plans envisioned by a party, but is rather based more on the popularity of a party. We need better highlights on each party and what they can offer on tv. Right now, we don't see a lot of that.

posted by Anonymous @ 7:47 AM 0 comments

"Do voters want meritocracy and competition or the policy of a new economic union, which could be the malaysia's bumiputra policy giving special treatment to Malays nad other indigenous people", PAP.

Come on, grow up malaysia....Singapore is laughing at us at the other side and we r still fighting over the scenic bridge? Plz get a life.... And about the stupid economic union.. will singapore be ever stupid to join us? who r we and who r they? what they have is elites in high position. and what do we have? we just have a bunch of skullheads from one particular race in a high position. Why dun we just let some blind ppl to steer the boat.i dun want to be insultive to the blinds here.. i do have respect for them.. but then .... sigh can't find another good comparison....

posted by Angelus @ 4:36 AM 0 comments

Live life with passion

Live life with passion. Love what you're doing, what you're studying, where you're living and what you do. Always look at what you have and where you are, improve and move towards your desired future in life. When you do all these with passion, it will make things easier and no sooner than later, you're already almost there.

posted by Anonymous @ 5:19 PM 0 comments

Given an inch you ask for a foot

"Am I giving too much?" you may ask sometimes. Is something holding you back from the life you deserve? Are your friends asking too much of you? These are questions that you may come across at a point in your life when you have not learnt to use the word "no". It may be hard to refuse someone at some point or avoid an event or occasion by saying no, but it is necessary. Overexhaustion from helping others more than yourself is not a good payback and has its toll on health and studies. Humans are quite hypocrite at times and they tend to help even when they do not want to.

When you give too much, you continue giving until nothing is left of you. The very essence which makes you you is lost through giving. Although the Buddha taught compassion, mindless giving is not a form of compassion. Real compassion is to give with thought and to be aware of its consequences. To give is to give the deserve, not the undeserving. To help is to help those who want to help themselves. When you give an inch to a someone, he may ask for a foot, and when give a foot he may ask for a mile. Do not feel too much pity towards the world that it may impede your better judgement. Look inside and cultivate self care and love. This is not selfish, this is life. To live is to endure hardships. Only until you have done your part in life will you experience happiness. So help others who only help themselves and let others care for themselves. The worries of others are trivial and not your business.

posted by Anonymous @ 5:03 PM 2 comments